Home and Alive

Another semester is completed and I am glad I still alive and the world still here. Plus, I'm home and surprisingly I manage to save some money and so far, I am not broke (well usually I'm broke the day I arrived at my home).

My plan for this semester break is too complete my internship successfully. Yes, I'm having my internship program during this break for the whole 2 months. So, good luck to me, and of course to all of my friends too.

To start my holiday havoc-ly, yesterday (8th May) I went to Lembah Bidong at Terengganu to join several of my friends from the Neo's club. Well, Lembah Bidong is well known for us for it's 400-500 meters straight track and guess what we were doing there. It was a drag battle! At first I didn't have any intention to join in the drag event, I was there because of my friend's request only (to make the crowds) and also because I just arrived at Kelantan the day before (7th May) and my lovely car and its handsome owner still tired from the traveling.

But then it turns out not to be like that. I've got some invitation(s?) to duel with them. What can I say, I just accepted it and wallah, I've won! Congrats to me. My machine is great, I love it.

Ask Me, Tell Me

Infected by Safwan, I make a formspring account too. So feel free to drop by and ask me anything or comment me anything, or insult me anything, everything is acceptable.

CLICK HERE

Bittersweet

Life, I don’t understand life. I don’t know if you or anybody else understands it. I believe if a person understands his or her life, he or she shall succeed and life goes beyond far from their expectation. Some people look their life from science perspective (Albert Einstein), some might look into the tiny world of digital and microprocessor (Bill Gates), there are also certain people who understand life via many discipline of life such as mathematics, geography, and astronomy (Al Khawarizmi), and let say there is only one person whose understanding is far beyond ours, this person understand His Creator, His people, His life, and though he is illiterates, his preach is still moving now though it is started hundred years back. Well, let us take a moment to selawat to him, who is our own beloved Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.

These are the people who understand their life most. They knew how to make the chances, spot the chances, grab the chances and they utilise it wisely and they have become the greatest human in their life and through our life they are still remembered. But how do I understand my life, I still don’t know what am I in this life. All I know in my life is to always be happy and try not to be sad. Happiness is my everything and I know life isn’t supposed to be happy at all times.

I am happy to know that now I have someone special to love but sadly I don’t know is it real love or it is just a matter of pity? It is also unhappy to wonder whether my love is enough or not for her, or does she love me too or, I’m thinking if we are faking our feelings because both of us were in the state of ‘stirred mind’ before we met. And I still have this thought in my mind whether is this just a normal crush or not but I swear this ‘crush’ is a little bit different from others. Is it because this girl is braver than others that makes me ‘cair’ to her. Whatever it is, if this is just a normal crush, I can be me again without any problem but to say this relationship is nothing and has no effect on me it is the blackest kind of blasphemy.

Last week, I was quite happy to join my two friends’ family gathering. Well I was there accidentally and you know how weird to be part of somebody else’s family dinner because you don’t know anybody else there except your friend. Seeing how love between family still exist in this world despite of current issue of throwing out babies, killing children, killing parents, killing siblings, I am so grateful to be part of my friend’s family dinner though I don’t contribute anything to cheer up the dinner but I am happy because at least I was in the family reunion mood. Too bad, too sad, it is a very long time ago since I was with my family and I miss being home.

Too good, I am so happy I have great friends to accolifmpany me here in Shah Alam. I have a lot to thanks them especially those who are at the rented house, at UiTM, at class, the Safwan-Adil-Min-Jarir of MRSM Langkawi, at Neo Performance Club (promote skeet.. hihi), at Petaling Jaya, and not to forget at the Segi college too (though we hardly know each other, everybody are simply good friends). And because I was always with my friends, I always happy with them.

I am prone to be happy all the times but there were times when God tests, happiness is taken and sadness glooming. Life becomes bitter everyday and all He wants is us to remember Him and pray to Him for guidance. After that happiness will come again. That is why bitter is sweet. Setiap kejadian ada hikmahnya.

PS/ I wish my friends Good Luck in examinations!

This Is For Everybody

One of my new year resolution is to get my blog keeps updated. Now it is almost April and my resolution is having a gloomy future. Everything about my new year's resolution is getting into failure day by day. My blog, my life, my study, my family's hope towards me, everything is in uncertain.

Nothing is certain in this life, but at least we can plan our life and I still fail to plan my life.

Blogging is one of the most enjoyable thing I had done in my life. Everyday, I used to visit other's blog, my mind is always thinking what is next to update, my mind is full of ideas. I used to love blogging and now, I just loveD blogging.

But now blogging is not my priority anymore. If in the past my mind used to thinking about blogging, but today it is not anymore. I have something new in my life to think about. Yes, this thing is really enjoyable. This is my first time in my life. Yes, this is really my first time and I'm afraid. lol. But things still in gloomy state. "SHE" confessed, but I'm so young, I'm so naive, I am so flattered, so I said, 'relax'. But I always think about her.

Love is taking over blogging in my life. But love is something I never want to be certain. She wants love but I want to get laid don't have love in me.

This is what currently happened to me in this few days, few weeks ago. So this explain why updating is so rare right now. (Ape kaitan eh ngan aku tak update? macam xde kaitan, aah biarlah)

This is a Joke, I am So Hot

Malaysia, a country where I can say a little bit moving backwardly. After 53 years of independent, after hundreds of years being ruled by Westerners, there is a thing that I am not satisfy with Malaysia.

Yesterday, today, the coming days, the weather is hot. Yesterday, I didn't stop sweating and changed my clothes for 4 times. I bathed for many many many times. Today,I didn't change that much clothes because there will be no more clothes for tomorrow. The day just getting hotter with this guy. Seriously, he has no life, that's whyhe never gets LD.

But the point of this post is, I am really dissapointed with Malaysia is because we still don't have snow in our land. Call me crazy or what. All i want is snow! Malaysian shouldrealize that we've been cheated the whole life. We need to revolt our way of life. Hot and humid climate is not relevant nowadays since the thinning of atmosphere. People, let's call for a change, push our Government to turn our climate into four season climates.

PS/ this post isjust for fun, I'm just kidding. So desperate to make some update since there is demand for it. To Malaysia, don't sue me. Hehehe

Story of Their Life

Recently, there are too many posts I've read about feelings, about love, about hardness going through life without the special one, especially from this guy and this guy. Well just like a man turns into a wolf when the moon are shining, I don't know if any places out there, the 12 planets in our galaxy made a straight line and turn my friends into a sadden and heart throbbing creature. Maybe life is too hard for them.

But my life is never easy on me too. Not to blame my friend's post about how gloomy this life is, I too had gone into a phase when my heart was throbbed, my mind unsettled, and things never going right for days. It happens not because of girls are ruining my life, hell no. My life is different with my friend's who I mentioned earlier. While they was sadden with their life, I was sad with other's life, when they were happily going out with our teacher back at MRSM, I was suffered at Gombak area in some place called Pondok Penyayang Raudhah. Well, story of their life, begins.

Last 6th February, I was following my housemate's class from other faculty into their charity event at that place. Well, at first I was told it was the place for the orphans, but when I was there, they are also hosting the single mother and the problematic teenage. The objective of the trip is to entertained the people there like doing some activities that helps to motivate them and gotong royong stuff.

When I was there, I pitied them. Not to pity why they were there, well I think they were there for good reasons. But I pity them because of the place they are living. It is too bad to be good. My rented house back in Shah Alam was way so much comfortable compared to theirs. They were lacked of so many facilities such as a place for a good sleep, to have a good meal, to study in a very comfortable environment, to have your body bathed in clean and tapped water, well they don't have any of these. When I was into their hostel, and entering their toilet, I saw this kid, a small kid, tough kid, brushing his clothes. Screech screech, screech, so faithfully brushing off the dirt. When I was that age, my dad still doing my laundry.

If the kid was sent by their parent because they can't help changing their children's bad behavior, well I think that is okay because the kid will only living there for a while. But try to imagine if there is a baby who was raised there and lived there, and face the truth that is their home, well I can't imagine that. I feel terrible for any children who was raised in that kind of place. I can't imagine if I was destined to live there, can I survive? I don't think I can. This trip really affects me, even days after that trip, I always think about them. Even when I want to do something the people of lifestyle of the rich and famous did, the mood will gone whenever their fate crossing my mind.

But going to that place also marks the lowest point of my life. I have done something that terribly affects my credibility. This kind of shame is greater compared to the shame when someone noticed you are not zipping your pants. Well, now, the story of my life. Everybody that closed to me knows that am afraid of cats, right? well, I never feels weird telling people I am afraid of cats, but I am most embarrassed when I reacted when cats are 'attacking' me. What happens there is, when I was at that place and listening their ustaz's lecture, well I don't bother to listen and read an pamphlet. I was very very very focused on the article when I was looking in front, there, standing (or sitting?) a cat, looking at me and I was shocked, and I jumped and attracts everybody's attention, and the cat was walking towards me, and there, there it is the most part, I hugged my friend just like a girl hugging a man when she saw a cockroaches. Can you imagine that? God that was so embarrassed! Everybody laughs. The lecturer laughs. The kids there laugh. I was a laughing stock for the whole day.

My story of lowest point in my life.

PS/ I am sorry if anybody of you who read this had lived there or any place like that and I sound like "what-the-hell-with-this-guy", I never mean to be rude by lowering your class and status of your living place, but to show that I am concerned with your hardness and difficulties. I hope anybody who lives in this kind of place will do well in their current life and their after life too.

Happy Chinese New Year

And this update this specially made for my beowolf beloved friends, Heroic and Mr. Schomey. And that's it, just an update. Kwang kwang kwang kwang